Race for Governor is Spicy As A Two Piece From Popeyes

Who knows what Attorney General Jeff Landry pulled off in that back room, but when he emerged, he emerged as the chosen one. The golden child of the Republican Party of Louisiana (LAGOP’s) executive committee sent to lead us sane citizens down a path of utter despair and destitution. Unless that is…if John Kennedy decides to stop him. Yes, Mr-Awe-Shucks-Call-A-Crackhead-John Kennedy.

Landry’s anointment wasn’t televised. But the LAGOP was so eager to ward off Kennedy from running, that they endorsed Landry for governor before any other Republican could officially enter the race. Of course, feathers ruffled. And a whole lot of hemming and hawing ensued. Billy-my-daddy-helped-build-this-party-Nungesser was especially rankled.

One of the LAGOP’s top executive members is Eddie Rispone. You should remember him. Last governor’s race, he came 40,000 votes away from running us aforementioned sane citizens off to Texas to join our Katrina family.

The Race For Governor Is Getting Spicy

As far as Kennedy goes, he hasn’t said if he’s getting in the race or not. But there’s no reason he shouldn’t run for governor. Yes, given his clout, he could rot in his senate seat if he wanted to. But that would be so low aspirational.

If he has any legacy type aspirations, he’d read the room. He’s 71, pretty long in the dentures now. Career-wise, he doesn’t have any type of ascending trajectory going on. His party is in the minority. So leading a committee isn’t in his near future. Neither is getting one of his non-whack-a-doodle bills passed. If he wants to leave his mark among the legion of Louisiana politicians, then there’s no other choice but to run for governor. He just won’t crackhead is way into the Louisiana hall of fame. Fellow Republicans are waiting with bated breath.

Billy Nungesser is one of them. With Kennedy taking his time, Nungesser bides his time. He’s now talking about making a big announcement on his birthday, in January. That means he’s shaking trees and kissing major ass in hopes that enough backers and favorable polls emerge to justify a run.

Wait, you do remember Billy Nungesser, right? Former Plaquemines Parish president? Our present Lieutenant Governor? Famous protector of Lauren Daigle. If not, just google his name and the BP Oil Spill. If you don’t find a picture of Nungesser parting the gulf with one hand and single handedly rescuing an oil-soaked pelican with the other, then you just aren’t searching hard enough.

Related: John Kennedy is Whack

Nungesser is no fan of Landry. Nungesser was probably ready to take it to the streets after the LAGOP’s endorsed Landry. Surely, he was set to proclaim that he single handily kept tourism alive during COVID. Oh and how he stood up to the Wicked Witch of New Orleans after she demanded a bigger piece of the state’s tourism pie. Then of course, for all the cultural warriors, there’s his defense of “poor” Lauren Daigle. If Kennedy hops in the race though, Nunguesser will be back out in the field hustling tourists and conventions by the time the race is over.

The Others

State Treasurer John Schroder is also among the rumored candidates. He is the biggest name of the others. These other potentials will probably decide not to waste other people’s money if Kennedy opts in. Senator Bill Cassidy was testing the waters. But he was pretty much told that Trump impeachers need not apply.

Democrats

You probably don’t know it. But yes, we do still have a Louisiana Democratic Party. The sitting governor is part Democrat depending on what angle you look at him. As far as potential replacements, they don’t have the big statewide names. Early polls show current New Orleans City Council President Helena Morena is the best bet. But she must decide if she wants to run for governor or save her money for a mayoral run. Recently, Shawn Wilson, Louisiana Transportation Secretary and a Democrat, is on record saying that the midterms gave him hope that Louisiana could elect a black man as governor. Pundits immediately questioned his political acumen.

Can a Democrat win statewide in the foreseeable future in Louisiana?

Other names being thrown around are Luke Mixon and Gary Chambers. But voters just rejected Mixon’s senate bid, emphatically. So why would they ever think about electing him as governor? And though Chambers placed second, his runs for multiple offices and campaign tactics are starting to diminish his seriousness as a real candidate for any office.

With the Democrats on the ropes, that just leaves one candidate for us to root for. His name is entertainment. Other than that, we got nothing to look forward to.

To be clear, a governor Kennedy would be as equally deplorable as a governor Landry. Choosing one would be like picking which bad taste you would like in your mouth. For entertainment purposes though, we should be hoping for a Kennedy run.

First, it would piss off a lot of state Republicans. Second, it would divide some loyalties. Third, watching Republican on Republican violence for months would be fun.

So somebody hit up Kennedy. Tell him to hurry up. If he needs encouraging, I’ll even chip in on his filing fee.

The Race For Governor Is Getting Spicy