At this rate, we’ll just have to hope Sen.John Kennedy gets caught sleeping with a farm animal or something. No other imaginable act would upset the sensibilities of the proud Louisianians who put him in office. That’s how deep our partisanship rolls. Gary Chambers and Luke MIxon better get their people on it ASAP. Their campaigns need a boost, some type of spark Wait, maybe they can call a crackhead for that.

If you haven’t seen it, I’m sure you’ve heard from somebody who has seen or heard. In an ad, his most popular thus far, Sen. Kennedy, our Sen. Kennedy, in all dead seriousness, looks into the camera and says:

“If you hate cops just because they’re cops, the next time you’re in trouble, call a crackhead.”

Genius. His supporters will love that.

But what if I hate cops for more than just because they’re cops? Should I call an alcoholic? What if I have a mild dislike? As my rationality increases does the competency of the person I call increase in direct proportion?

How did we end up with this man? Do we deserve him?

Again: “If you hate cops just because they’re cops, the next time you’re in trouble, call a crackhead.”

Kennedy plays dumb. But he knows what he’s doing. He knows in these info-age days, the stereotype still remains. Crack = black, just like crime. So when he blows this whistle, his supporter’s ears perk up. They hear: elect me and I’ll keep these negroes in line. They won’t be carjacking, murdering and robbing people, and sitting around living it up off food stamps as long as I’m in office.

Even Gov. John Bel Edwards’ ears are tuned. In an interview, Edwards, our governor, lent a sympathetic ear, saying he understands what Kennedy was trying to say. He just felt Kennedy could’ve said it better. Edwards equated it with some anti-defund the police mumbo jumbo. When it comes to black people and police, though, Edwards has made his feelings quite clear (see Ronald Greene).

Luke Mixon deserve better. So do Democrats. With the Senate in the balance and Kennedy out here throwing zingers, Edwards was supposed to zing right back. That’s how the game goes. But he didn’t. Edwards is supporting Mixon for senator. I’m sure Mixon just loved his response.

“If you hate cops just because they’re cops, the next time you’re in trouble, call a crackhead.”

I was in trouble last night. I tried to call a crackhead. But I only got Sen. Kennedy’s voicemail.

Prepare yourself. We might be stuck with this man for awhile. Kennedy is only 70 years old. In politician, that’s like middle age these days. With the way the race is going, he’s set to Electric Slide straight back into office. He has two opponents, both Democrats.

Gary Chambers initially made some noise. But his chances probably went Up In Smoke when he lit a blunt in his first ad (crackheads and blunts, what year is this election being run in?) Mixon, even with Edwards’ support, only has about $580,000 on hand, compared to Kennedy’s $15 million. So yeah, more money and a bigger whistle, things aren’t looking good. We’re definitely going to need that farm animal. I wonder who got the hookup. Anybody knows somebody who knows somebody? Or do we have to call a crackhead for that?