With one of his first moves as mayor of New Orleans, Governor Jeff Landry created his own police force. Troop NOLA. As far as we know, the troop will consist of 40 state troopers. They’re set to be deployed after Mardi Gras. The troopers won’t be coming to hug thugs, operate in shambles, or be nice to black people, if you take any of Landry’s campaign ads at their implied word.

Instead, the troop is coming to protect an asset. An asset. Yes, that’s how Landry views the city — in purely financial terms. The troop will have their own captain. They’ll have their own inspector. And their own set of prosecutors to try their cases. This was all setup without consulting our secondary mayor Latoya Cantrell. If all goes well in the upcoming special and legislative sessions, this siege might go on for at least a decade according to Landry.

Is Gov Landry trying to takeover NOLA?

But how will this work? When calling 911, will we be able to request the troop instead of the NOPD? If we feel the troop is corrupt, can we call the NOPD on them? Speaking of questions, one really needs answering.

People are making crazy claims about new state Attorney General, Liz Murrill. Despite multiple rumors, Think504 can definitively confirm that Attorney General Liz Murrill is in fact not a vampire. She can’t be. There are rules. To enter a home a vampire, the occupant must invite the vampire in. If the present occupant doesn’t provide such an invitation, then the vampire cannot go in. This is simple vampire 101. As former President Donald Trump would say, “Everybody knows this.”

The same scenario goes for Attorneys General who want to prosecute cases locally. They have to be invited by the present occupant of the local D.A’s office. As far as we know, our D.A. Jason Williams never invited Murrill. Yet here she is, setting up shop. At the behest of her boss (Landry), her office plans to prosecute all cases brought forth by Troop NOLA.

Related: Jeff Landry Already Causing Problems in NOLA

So if Murrill wasn’t invited to prosecute cases, how did it come about that her office is setting up shop here. Beats the hell out of me. We don’t get explanations these days. We just get strange occurrences, like that press conference Landry and Williams gave at the Super Dome.

Early last year, Williams and Landry had beef. Williams steamed. He considered running against Landry for Governor. Now they’re inexplicable buddies. At that press conference, Williams stood at a Super Dome podium welcoming Murrill and Landry with open arms. And he didn’t want to just make it clear that their newfound friendship was all grits and gravy, he wanted to make it “really, abundantly clear.” Really and abundantly. If you’re counting, that’s not just one, but two adverbs. Double-downed emphasis and dedication.

It’s not just Williams though. As former president Donald Trump would say, many people are doing it. Mayor Cantrell, for example. Regarding Landry, Mayor Cantrell also suddenly developed newfound admiration and subservience. You’d think it’d be the opposite.

Right after Landry got elected, he disrespected Cantrell in more than a few ways. He created a crime commission led by people who wanted to recall her. He announced Troop NOLA without consulting her. And he called the city and the NOPD a shambled waste of an asset plagued by a hug-a-thug justice system.

Related: Councilman Thomas Questions Use of State Police

In response, Cantrell bent the knee and basically abdicated her throne. She said she appreciated all Governor Landry is doing to help the good people of New Orleans. Then she flew off to Vegas — a week early to work at the Super Bowl. Fantastic.

There are two upcoming dates to look out for. February 14th, Valentine’s Day. That’s the earliest Troop NOLA can be deployed under operation asset attainment. So romantic. And February 19th. That’s the day Landry’s special legislative crime session begins. This session is the earliest Landry’s proposals can come to funding fruition. Stay tuned. As former President Donald Trump would say, it’s going to be bigly.