Operation make New Orleans white again has now entered phase 2. In inner circles, the code name for this operation is Nashville or Charleston, depending on the unit. Phase 1 came to a close last week. Now pieces are being put in position for phase 2.

Troops are set to be deployed. A well-known member of the delegation has switched sides. The mayor and Council president have retreated to squabbling over missing keys, and eviction notices while the architect of the takeover comes in and stunts all over their city. Yes, as usual, things are a goddamn mess around here. And we can’t even get crawfish at a decent price anymore.

Governor Landry Is Planning A Great Out Migration

With phase 1, the special session on crime, wrapped up, Governor Landry has to be pleased. Things have just been going swimmingly. So swimmingly, that last week Landry made it a point to drive all the way down here to New Orleans to sign 8 bills from that session into law. He could’ve easily done that in Baton Rouge. But clearly, he wanted to flex in New Orleans and send a message that things are changing around here. 

To date, the cavalry has been compliant. Or complacent. Or absent. Even,in the case of Austin Badon, just straight up switched parties. Councilman Oliver Thomas, and state Rep. Mandie Landry voiced strong opposition. But if you’re looking for our fearless leader, Mayor Cantrell, you can find her on the tarmac, possibly with the keys to the Pontalba. Or if you’re looking for our Council President J.P. Morrell, you can find him on his favorite talk radio station complaining about the mayor, and distracted about keys to the Pontalba.

Meanwhile,  people and police can now feel a bit more secure about shooting black people (criminals, they call them, or those suspected of being one). That’s thanks to HB2, the immunity bill Landry signed last week. HB19 deploys Troop Nola to stick the state’s nose into policing the city. SB3 lowered the age the state can charge and prosecute as adults. HB1 makes any legal mistake you make as a child a matter of public record. HB7 ups the penalty for carjacking.

Governor Landry Is Planning A Great Out Migration

These and the other 3 bills Landry signed here are not only about being tough on crime, but also making it less desirable to raise a kid here. One mistake, and your kid could end up dead or with a record that haunts him for life, even if he is completely innocent.

Whether you think crime is bad or not, a terrible precedent is being set. Armed with a super majority legislature, the governor and legislators created laws the many New Orleanians disagree with. Next up is phase 2 – tampering with the water system and schools.

In his latest food ratings, the ever-viral food critic Keith Lee ranked New Orleans as the best city he visited. Right behind it was Houston. Yes, Houston. Who would’ve ever thought Houston. But as my wife pointed out, Houston probably ranks so high because so many people from here moved there and set up shop after Katrina. Looking back, Katrina ushered in the first great migration of black people out of this city in our lifetime. If Landry gets his way, there just might be a second one. Then New Orleans can live happily ever white again. 

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